I was house managing a play when she walked in. She was not the only celebrity I'd met at Williamstown Theatre Festival, summer stock home of so many of Broadway's favorites and hopefuls. As she walked towards the theatre's entrance, I was faced with a moral dilemma I hoped I'd never face. But nonetheless I was forced to action—it cut me to say it, but I must do my job, and I must do it well:
"You know you can't bring that into the theatre, right?" speaking of the dish of ice cream in her hands. No food or drink was allowed in the theatre.
Remembering herself, she looked down at her Styrofoam bowl, complete with plastic spoon and overturned sugar cone—and gleefully sputtered, "I got here earlier, but I needed some ice cream so I left."
The following is what that made this moment in time such a pinnacle of my existence. Rather than asking where there might be a receptacle to dispose of her unfinished delight, she promptly inquired if there might be a freezer to store her sweet temptation. Dutifully, I escorted her.
There was much to discuss with my new compatriot in lactose. She had gone to the local place, Lickety Split, and was still reeling from how good it was. Enthusiastically, I told her she had to try their signature flavor, Purple Cow. "Ooh, what's that?" "Raspberry ice cream with chocolate and white chocolate pieces and a raspberry swirl."
For some reason, I did not ask her what flavor she had tried. I was feeling a bit shy, nervous to ask such a personal question, but felt confident enough to make a few sidelong glances. My leering soon left me deflated: she seemed to have a frou-frou coffee flavor.
Arriving at our rendezvous destination, I opened the freezer door for her with all the chivalry I could muster. Already inside the freezer sat a half gallon I had placed for storage earlier. "I am an ice cream fiend," I told her, feeling a little exposed. I felt safe, though, not at all ashamed or scared.
As her treat entered my secret place, I sneaked another peek at her dish's contents. At second glance it appeared to be deep, pure, and uniform as only chocolate can be. This put all my fears to rest. We walked the 15 second trek back to the theatre with smiles on our faces.
She entered the theatre and my friend who works in the box office called me over to ask where "Marisa Tomei and I" had walked off to together all "buddy-buddy." I told him I had taken her to a freezer to store her ice cream, and in saying this I realized I was probably the only person in the world who thought this to be more intimate than anything else we could have accomplished in such a short span of time. Mmm, ice cream talk. Foreplay for the loser.
• • •
As the play came to a close I took my post near the door as people exited. She came to me and asked me where the stage door was to meet the actors exit from. I directed her in the proper direction and told her with a knowing smile, "I can show you to your ice cream when you're ready." I looked forward to another rendezvous, once more sharing our passion, and again showing her the opulence of my frozen safehold.
...But sadly, this is where our story ends. It seems our heroin, in all of her cravings, did not feel the need to come and claim her beloved.
Oh, how we all dream in this life! Dreams of theatres where ice cream can gain admittance, dreams of conversations with movie stars, dreams of Marisa Tomei inviting us over for sex and pie. How rare it is that we appreciate the dreams that we live daily more than the dreams we wish would come true. How rare it is to be so virtuous! To hold such virtue would be, well, the kingdom of heaven. Yes, and ice cream is the kingdom come to earth. Ice cream, one could conclude, IS life!
Indeed. And I hold the spoon.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Happy Today's-as-good-as-any-to-treat-me-to-dessert Day!
Chocolate-covered strawberries. They might be my absolute favorite food. And I'm not at all opinionated about them, whether they are fancy, messy, fresh, chilled, dark, milk, big, or small, I will enjoy them. I'm not sure I could elaborate. But please take note, friends, since there are many occasions throughout the year to surprise me.
That being said, we'll move on to ice cream, a much more diverse ground for discussion:
Forrest Gump once said, "Stupid is as stupid does," and you'd would be doing quite a bit of stupid if you missed Turkey Hill's Box of Chocolates, a Limited Edition flavor whose half gallon package is covered in red and pink hearts for--I'm guessing--Abraham Lincoln's 200th birthday. Each spoonful of the chocolate-based flavor has chocolate flakes and, if that weren't enough, most bites also contain one of the many items you might find in a box of chocolates: chocolate raspberry cups, chocolate almonds and white chocolate chunks, each from Gertrude Hawk Chocolates. (If you go to their website, you'll find that they ship chocolate-covered strawberries. I thought you might find that interesting.)
Turkey Hill is a regional ice cream company specializing making and distributing premium ice cream to the Northeast and Mid-Atlantic United States. Their tasty product is among the higher-end options available in half gallon varieties. You may have noticed that they, like one Canadian chocolate company, have chosen a bizarre set of words for marketing a dessert product. No need to fear: their ice cream is 100% turkey-free.
That being said, we'll move on to ice cream, a much more diverse ground for discussion:
Forrest Gump once said, "Stupid is as stupid does," and you'd would be doing quite a bit of stupid if you missed Turkey Hill's Box of Chocolates, a Limited Edition flavor whose half gallon package is covered in red and pink hearts for--I'm guessing--Abraham Lincoln's 200th birthday. Each spoonful of the chocolate-based flavor has chocolate flakes and, if that weren't enough, most bites also contain one of the many items you might find in a box of chocolates: chocolate raspberry cups, chocolate almonds and white chocolate chunks, each from Gertrude Hawk Chocolates. (If you go to their website, you'll find that they ship chocolate-covered strawberries. I thought you might find that interesting.)
Turkey Hill is a regional ice cream company specializing making and distributing premium ice cream to the Northeast and Mid-Atlantic United States. Their tasty product is among the higher-end options available in half gallon varieties. You may have noticed that they, like one Canadian chocolate company, have chosen a bizarre set of words for marketing a dessert product. No need to fear: their ice cream is 100% turkey-free.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
The Story of How the Brubakers Came to America
It is one of my family's classic stories. When the Brubakers first came over to America, they were on the same vessel as the Hershey family. Since a charismatic nature runs in the family, it's no surprise that the Hersheys were quite taken by my forefathers. In fact, the friendship blossomed so much that the Hershey family asked the Brubakers if we would be interested in joining them in the chocolate business they intended to start in the new world.
"No," we said. "We intend to open our own grocery store."
Both families would later settle in the commonwealth of Pennsylvania. There is still a large population of Brubakers there and, well, you know about the Hersheys. The Brubakers actually would go on to experience prosperity as grocers, but, suffice to say, there isn't an amusement park erected in our image.
"No," we said. "We intend to open our own grocery store."
Both families would later settle in the commonwealth of Pennsylvania. There is still a large population of Brubakers there and, well, you know about the Hersheys. The Brubakers actually would go on to experience prosperity as grocers, but, suffice to say, there isn't an amusement park erected in our image.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Don't be swindled by low prices!
It would make sense for chocolate to contain cocoa butter, right? Well, some companies have been exploring other options.
In America, there has been a pattern of using less and less cocoa butter because, rather than using it in the chocolate, many chocolate companies are selling their cocoa butter to cosmetics companies. Instead cheaper, lower quality fats (such as sunflower oil, palm oil, and coconut oil, among others) are added to the “chocolate” we tend to see in the supermarket. But wait…can you call a product “chocolate” if it doesn’t contain cocoa butter, or at least some percentage of the fats come from cocoa butter? Some companies are trying to see to it that the definition of chocolate is changed!
How is this even possible? During the process of making chocolate, they press the cocoa beans to extract the cocoa butter, leaving behind cocoa powder or cocoa mass. (For those that are curious after my detailed report on how chocolate is made, this scandalous extraction is done by the companies in question after the beans are roasted but before they are put through the stone mill.)
American chocolate is known for its waxy, sour taste. Now you know why. By certain definitions it isn’t chocolate. So when you see an expensive chocolate bar, it probably is expensive for a reason: namely, that it contains more chocolate. Makes sense why it tastes better, huh? When you see a percentage written on a chocolate bar it accounts for the percentage of actual cocoa solids, cacao or cocoa mass.
In short: If it’s chocolate you want, don’t accept anything that doesn’t have some form of cocoa, cacao or chocolate as the first ingredient. Stay safe. Stay informed.
In America, there has been a pattern of using less and less cocoa butter because, rather than using it in the chocolate, many chocolate companies are selling their cocoa butter to cosmetics companies. Instead cheaper, lower quality fats (such as sunflower oil, palm oil, and coconut oil, among others) are added to the “chocolate” we tend to see in the supermarket. But wait…can you call a product “chocolate” if it doesn’t contain cocoa butter, or at least some percentage of the fats come from cocoa butter? Some companies are trying to see to it that the definition of chocolate is changed!
How is this even possible? During the process of making chocolate, they press the cocoa beans to extract the cocoa butter, leaving behind cocoa powder or cocoa mass. (For those that are curious after my detailed report on how chocolate is made, this scandalous extraction is done by the companies in question after the beans are roasted but before they are put through the stone mill.)
American chocolate is known for its waxy, sour taste. Now you know why. By certain definitions it isn’t chocolate. So when you see an expensive chocolate bar, it probably is expensive for a reason: namely, that it contains more chocolate. Makes sense why it tastes better, huh? When you see a percentage written on a chocolate bar it accounts for the percentage of actual cocoa solids, cacao or cocoa mass.
In short: If it’s chocolate you want, don’t accept anything that doesn’t have some form of cocoa, cacao or chocolate as the first ingredient. Stay safe. Stay informed.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Obama ice cream? Yes, Pecan!
We interrupt chocolate month to announce some breaking news:
Thanks to Ben & Jerry's, eating ice cream is now patriotic, my friends.
Thanks to Ben & Jerry's, eating ice cream is now patriotic, my friends.
Step 1 to Becoming a Chocolate Connoisseur
Theo Chocolate bars (and their 3400 Phinney bars) are available nationwide at all Whole Foods locations. They are the only chocolate company in the U.S. whose ingredients are certified Fair Trade; they also are the only chocolate company in the U.S. whose ingredients are certified organic. And did I mention that they are one of only 12 US chocolate companies that, bean-to-bar, does the entire chocolate-making process themselves. Where better place to learn how chocolate is made? They give daily tours, 7 days a week in their factory, located in Seattle's Fremont neighborhood.
Cacao (or the Americanized term cocoa) is the seed of a fruit—not technically a bean, though it is referred to as one—that grows from the trunk and lowest branches of the tree known as Theobroma Cacao. This tree can be seen in countries within 20º of the Equator. To get to the seeds, the fruit innards—seeds and all—are pulled out to ferment for 7 days. (This is the stage that most affects the flavor of the bean.) The seeds are then dried on slats. The dried seeds are then bagged up and sent to a plant. At the plant, the beans are cleaned, roasted, and split with a “bean guillotine,” removing the shell and leaving only the brittle innards (pictured), or what is called the “nib.” (It takes about 70-80 beans to make one 3 oz. dark chocolate bar.) Then the magic happens.
The nibs are roasted, developing their flavor, before they are crushed into a paste with a consistency not unlike freshly ground peanut butter. It is then reduced into a more liquefied form, technically called “chocolate liquor.” Next the sugar is added, as well as the milk for milk chocolate. Next, more complicated things: the sugar particle size is reduced, the acid is reduced, until finally the cocoa solids that have been created are reunited with the cocoa butter (which was previously extracted from the bean). Next all that needs to happen is molding the chocolate, getting the temperature down and packaging it…or if you happen to own a chocolate factory for strictly personal use, forgo the packaging and eat right off the assembly line.
Another option is to add cream to the chocolate. The chocolate is completely processed and formed into a block. Next, remelt the block and mix in hot cream (possibly already fused with other flavors, such as mint. Then, use a marble countertop to temper the ganache—the name for chocolate with cream in it—so the cocoa butter doesn’t separate. Then you can use it for making truffles or other confections.
As I've said before, Theo’s products are incredible. Visit the factory and sample nearly all of it in their factory store, or take the tour and try a little more!
Cacao (or the Americanized term cocoa) is the seed of a fruit—not technically a bean, though it is referred to as one—that grows from the trunk and lowest branches of the tree known as Theobroma Cacao. This tree can be seen in countries within 20º of the Equator. To get to the seeds, the fruit innards—seeds and all—are pulled out to ferment for 7 days. (This is the stage that most affects the flavor of the bean.) The seeds are then dried on slats. The dried seeds are then bagged up and sent to a plant. At the plant, the beans are cleaned, roasted, and split with a “bean guillotine,” removing the shell and leaving only the brittle innards (pictured), or what is called the “nib.” (It takes about 70-80 beans to make one 3 oz. dark chocolate bar.) Then the magic happens.
The nibs are roasted, developing their flavor, before they are crushed into a paste with a consistency not unlike freshly ground peanut butter. It is then reduced into a more liquefied form, technically called “chocolate liquor.” Next the sugar is added, as well as the milk for milk chocolate. Next, more complicated things: the sugar particle size is reduced, the acid is reduced, until finally the cocoa solids that have been created are reunited with the cocoa butter (which was previously extracted from the bean). Next all that needs to happen is molding the chocolate, getting the temperature down and packaging it…or if you happen to own a chocolate factory for strictly personal use, forgo the packaging and eat right off the assembly line.
Another option is to add cream to the chocolate. The chocolate is completely processed and formed into a block. Next, remelt the block and mix in hot cream (possibly already fused with other flavors, such as mint. Then, use a marble countertop to temper the ganache—the name for chocolate with cream in it—so the cocoa butter doesn’t separate. Then you can use it for making truffles or other confections.
As I've said before, Theo’s products are incredible. Visit the factory and sample nearly all of it in their factory store, or take the tour and try a little more!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
In lieu of moose jerky…
In a recent jaunt to Canada, I decided to take in the local color, by which I mean the snacks. Nestlé ice cream was readily available, featuring some flavors I’d never seen. The most exciting of these was Rolo ice cream. Imagine Rolos in all their caramel-y goodness sitting deliciously in chocolate ice cream—the way God intended ice cream flavors inspired by chocolate-covered candy. Mmmm. While the nature of my trip did not allow me to try Canadian ice cream, I did walk away with a LOT of foreign candy.
A couple simple observations can be made: (a) Nestlé and Cadbury take over most of the candy section and many American Hershey products are nowhere to be seen. (b) They have many, MANY varieties of Kit Kat bars, including cinnamon. (c) Canadians have a strange fascination with air bubbles in their candy. (d) Coffee chocolate is quite popular, which I had no interest in trying. (e) Their candy bars are significantly larger in size. (f) Everything was in both English and French, so they had Original Skittles and Skittles Originaux!
Worth Trying
- Mars Malteasers – Wonderful malted milk, covered in chocolate. I cannot stomach
Whoppers, but these are great! - Cool Dark Zero – Also available in milk and white, the wrapper says this treat is “Cool filled dark chocolate.” It is my policy to purchase any product that is “cool filled.” Taste-wise it was like a Moritz Ice Square, only with dark chocolate. Another comparison would be a dark Lindt truffle.
- Cadbury Wunderbar – The name and Viking-themed packaging made this product stick out as the most awesome. (Yes, even more awesome than the semi-holographic Cool Dark Zero.) It also was my favorite: caramel, peanut butter and a few crispy rice puffs enrobed in chocolate.
- Cadbury Crunchie – Sponge toffee, which is not unlike honeycomb candy. It had a nice aftertaste similar to a golden brown marshmallow.
- Bounty – Chocolate covered coconut bar, not unlike Mounds, but with a delightful tropical-themed package!
- Cadbury Sweet Marie – More or less a Baby Ruth.
- Cadbury Mr. Big – Imagine a Baby Ruth—or a Sweet Marie—but with a wafer in the place of nougat, and less peanuts.
- Nestlé Aero Peppermint – In addition to being a good source of bubbles, the package also advertises in bright red that it is a source of calcium! “Have you felt the bubbles melt? Laissez fonder les bulles…” Basically, it’s less chocolate in the same volume candy bar.
- Nestlé Big Turk – To me, this was the funniest of the bunch. The front of the package is covered with words, but has no explanation of the contents except it has “60% less fat that the average chocolate bar,” which doesn’t exactly promise that the consumer will find chocolate within. Really this tagline should be used by more products (i.e. zucchini, kumquats, bottled water). It ended up being gummy candy with a thin chocolate coating, a treat known as Turkish Delight. A weird combo to me, not one I could delight in.
- Nielsen’s Jersey Milk – Being an American, I associate the word "Jersey" with the city of Newark, not with cows. Thus, the humor of a company settling on the word “Jersey” for selling a candy is endless. This plain milk chocolate bar tastes like what I used to get from advent calendars leading up to Christmas.
- Eat-More – This product of Hershey’s Canada wins the prize for most generic-looking wrapper design. It is a “Dark Toffee Peanut Chew,” which means it is bendable—perhaps even pose-able!—with the consistency of a Power Bar.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Ep.6: Häagen-Dazs is better than Santa Clause.
Though my dad and I could have continued driving and exploring America for much longer, we wanted to be home for Christmas. After visiting family near New Orleans, we drove long stretches with no stopping to get to southeast Virginia on time for holiday celebrations.
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From what I remember, the last ground-breaking new holiday-themed ice cream to hit grocery stores was Ben & Jerry's Seinfeld-inspired Festivus ice cream, which was essentially gingerbread ice cream. Other grocery store brands jumped on the band wagon in years to come, offering their own gingerbread ice creams. But since then, there's been a dry spell of new holiday-themed flavor ideas. I mean, we've already got eggnog, pumpkin, candy cane and gingerbread. So what's left? Chestnuts roasting on an open fire ice cream? Pine-scented Christmas tree ice cream? Venison ice cream? Häagen-Dazs has outdone themselves again with their latest Limited Edition flavor: Peppermint Bark. Wait, but with mint chocolate chip and candy cane ice cream already on the market, is this a new idea for ice cream? Yes, and here's why.
In its native form, peppermint bark is a holiday treat that is part chocolate, part white chocolate (sometimes mint-infused) and part crunchy candy cane. It sticks out as something different in the mint candy genre. Equal parts creamy, minty and chocolatey. Ghirardelli's Peppermint Bark has been the favorite treat in my Christmas stocking for years.
Mint ice cream exists in many forms. My mom prefers the especially crunchy candy cane variety. I prefer the creamier mint chip variety. Some have a mint ice cream base, other vanilla. Some have cookies mixed in, others Andes mints or York peppermint patties. Some have a mint flavor only at first taste, others are extra-minty and linger like a breath-freshening mint. There are others still: an entirely separate category of chocolate-based mint flavors such as Girl Scout Thin Mint. But until now, no grocery store brand has sought to marry the flavors (and textures) of peppermint bark in an ice cream. Until now.
Häagen-Dazs Peppermint Bark is a white chocolate ice cream with bits of peppermint bark broken up throughout and some extra pieces of candy cane mixed in. This combination makes it a mint ice cream my mom and I can agree on. Maybe that's why she knew it would be a perfect gift for me this Christmas. Thanks, Mom!
UPDATE: After extensive "research," I've decided the best way to eat this concoction is to double-fist Ghirardelli's Peppermint Bark with the Häagen-Dazs. This increases the chocolate content, but also provides the added bonus of prolonging how long each product will last.
---
From what I remember, the last ground-breaking new holiday-themed ice cream to hit grocery stores was Ben & Jerry's Seinfeld-inspired Festivus ice cream, which was essentially gingerbread ice cream. Other grocery store brands jumped on the band wagon in years to come, offering their own gingerbread ice creams. But since then, there's been a dry spell of new holiday-themed flavor ideas. I mean, we've already got eggnog, pumpkin, candy cane and gingerbread. So what's left? Chestnuts roasting on an open fire ice cream? Pine-scented Christmas tree ice cream? Venison ice cream? Häagen-Dazs has outdone themselves again with their latest Limited Edition flavor: Peppermint Bark. Wait, but with mint chocolate chip and candy cane ice cream already on the market, is this a new idea for ice cream? Yes, and here's why.
In its native form, peppermint bark is a holiday treat that is part chocolate, part white chocolate (sometimes mint-infused) and part crunchy candy cane. It sticks out as something different in the mint candy genre. Equal parts creamy, minty and chocolatey. Ghirardelli's Peppermint Bark has been the favorite treat in my Christmas stocking for years.
Mint ice cream exists in many forms. My mom prefers the especially crunchy candy cane variety. I prefer the creamier mint chip variety. Some have a mint ice cream base, other vanilla. Some have cookies mixed in, others Andes mints or York peppermint patties. Some have a mint flavor only at first taste, others are extra-minty and linger like a breath-freshening mint. There are others still: an entirely separate category of chocolate-based mint flavors such as Girl Scout Thin Mint. But until now, no grocery store brand has sought to marry the flavors (and textures) of peppermint bark in an ice cream. Until now.
Häagen-Dazs Peppermint Bark is a white chocolate ice cream with bits of peppermint bark broken up throughout and some extra pieces of candy cane mixed in. This combination makes it a mint ice cream my mom and I can agree on. Maybe that's why she knew it would be a perfect gift for me this Christmas. Thanks, Mom!
UPDATE: After extensive "research," I've decided the best way to eat this concoction is to double-fist Ghirardelli's Peppermint Bark with the Häagen-Dazs. This increases the chocolate content, but also provides the added bonus of prolonging how long each product will last.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Ep.5: Denton, The Home of Happiness
Continuing east, we drove across Texas, from Amarillo to Dallas and on to New Orleans.
---
An hour northwest of downtown Dallas is the small town of Denton, TX. Remembering that my friend Ben had spent some years in this burg, I let him know we were passing through. He knew just the place I had to stop, too.
Beth Marie’s Old Fashioned Ice Cream shines even brighter than the elegant holiday lights across the street, shining on the old courthouse in Denton’s Town Square. Within the shop, newspaper articles on the walls featured their ice cream expert boasting of knowing 65 recipes at present—the store had at least 40 available—but went on to say she could make up a new one every day if she wanted. Suffice to say, if I were the President elect, I would create a cabinet position for her.
And what were the flavors? So glad you asked, italicized lettering. Anytime, friend. Among them were the five my dad and I tried: Butter Brittle, Turtle Torture, Apple Pie, French Toast and their brilliantly-named gingerbread concoction Hansel & Gretel. Each of the flavors was magnificently textured. I regret not trying the Chocolate-Covered Cherry, a flavor that I later learned received a third place award from the National Ice Cream Retailers Association, as did their Hansel & Gretel.
Another unique feature is that the ice cream is priced by the ounce. Why this is a good thing: after ice cream was scooped for my dish, I could politely ask for a bigger scoop and receive a warm smile instead of an irritated look.
Thanks for the great recommendation, Ben!
---
An hour northwest of downtown Dallas is the small town of Denton, TX. Remembering that my friend Ben had spent some years in this burg, I let him know we were passing through. He knew just the place I had to stop, too.
Beth Marie’s Old Fashioned Ice Cream shines even brighter than the elegant holiday lights across the street, shining on the old courthouse in Denton’s Town Square. Within the shop, newspaper articles on the walls featured their ice cream expert boasting of knowing 65 recipes at present—the store had at least 40 available—but went on to say she could make up a new one every day if she wanted. Suffice to say, if I were the President elect, I would create a cabinet position for her.
And what were the flavors? So glad you asked, italicized lettering. Anytime, friend. Among them were the five my dad and I tried: Butter Brittle, Turtle Torture, Apple Pie, French Toast and their brilliantly-named gingerbread concoction Hansel & Gretel. Each of the flavors was magnificently textured. I regret not trying the Chocolate-Covered Cherry, a flavor that I later learned received a third place award from the National Ice Cream Retailers Association, as did their Hansel & Gretel.
Another unique feature is that the ice cream is priced by the ounce. Why this is a good thing: after ice cream was scooped for my dish, I could politely ask for a bigger scoop and receive a warm smile instead of an irritated look.
Thanks for the great recommendation, Ben!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Ep.4: McDisappointed
After Utah, we trekked down to the Grand Canyon and finally resumed driving east.
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In Albuquerque, my dad and I spotted a Circle K, which being Virginians we're not accustomed to seeing. Our first response was to wonder if "strange things were afoot." Curious, we stopped in and my dad remarked that we might find a frozen dessert there. Nothing tickled our fancy, so we left...and then we saw it: The Golden Arches.
I admit it: I love McDonald's caramel sundaes. Its simplicity isn't accomplished anywhere else. Hot caramel on the bottom, vanilla softserve in the middle, hot caramel and nuts on top. Snuggling up with one in my warm winter jacket seemed the perfect ending to our long, cold day of driving in pouring snow.
"Yeah," I moped, "but the past few times I've asked, the McDonald's I was at didn't have caramel, just hot fudge." (I've always liked caramel more than hot fudge. In fact, for a time I never didn't even like hot fudge, preferring chocolate sauce. This made me the black sheep at family birthday parties growing up.) Dad thought we'd have better luck in New Mexico thanks to the large Mexican population and given that caramel--dulce de leche, actually-- is a popular flavor in Mexico. Triunfa!
If high hopes were sundaes , my life would be a ziggy-piggy buffet, but unfortunately this time they same crashing down into little pieces, not unlike chopped nuts. No caramel sundae!
McDonald'ses around the world, I'm begging you: Bring back my simple pleasure! Bring back the caramel sundae!
---
In Albuquerque, my dad and I spotted a Circle K, which being Virginians we're not accustomed to seeing. Our first response was to wonder if "strange things were afoot." Curious, we stopped in and my dad remarked that we might find a frozen dessert there. Nothing tickled our fancy, so we left...and then we saw it: The Golden Arches.
I admit it: I love McDonald's caramel sundaes. Its simplicity isn't accomplished anywhere else. Hot caramel on the bottom, vanilla softserve in the middle, hot caramel and nuts on top. Snuggling up with one in my warm winter jacket seemed the perfect ending to our long, cold day of driving in pouring snow.
"Yeah," I moped, "but the past few times I've asked, the McDonald's I was at didn't have caramel, just hot fudge." (I've always liked caramel more than hot fudge. In fact, for a time I never didn't even like hot fudge, preferring chocolate sauce. This made me the black sheep at family birthday parties growing up.) Dad thought we'd have better luck in New Mexico thanks to the large Mexican population and given that caramel--dulce de leche, actually-- is a popular flavor in Mexico. Triunfa!
If high hopes were sundaes , my life would be a ziggy-piggy buffet, but unfortunately this time they same crashing down into little pieces, not unlike chopped nuts. No caramel sundae!
McDonald'ses around the world, I'm begging you: Bring back my simple pleasure! Bring back the caramel sundae!
Friday, December 12, 2008
Ep.3: Bovine Intervention to Supine Conversation
After Yellowstone, our trip took us south into Utah for 4 days of national parks and a Utah Jazz game. But, following that old adage, I will now focus on the journey instead of the destination.
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My dad and I have had many a conversation on important world issues while on roadtrips, including one infamous family drive where we all did nothing but come up with band names, including the Smiling Potatoes of Death, the State-line Walrus Jockeys and one controversial name that is not allowed to be mentioned in my family since that fated drive. Between Dillon, Montana and Idaho Falls, Idaho, we encountered a grand total of three (3) other cars on our side of the road. This accurately represents how little there was to see. But it was a full moon, casting a certain glow on the mountains as well as the cows in the fields. I quipped to my dad that one knew a scene was magnificent if the cows look picturesque.
This got us discussing the life of a cow. (Like I said, a long road of nothing.) After much discussion, I concluded that I wouldn't enjoy being a cow. "Why?" Dad asked. "Because I wouldn't be able to eat ice cream." ...Amongst castration, a painful procedure of cutting off a cow's horns and inevitable execution, that's the best I could come up with.
I had incorrectly concluded that it would be cannibalistic for a cow to drink cow's milk. While this is true when the character Heffer in the Nickolodeon cartoon "Rocko's Modern Life" eats a hamburger, it is not true of drinking milk. But would it be vegan? We couldn't decide. It's not new news that earlier this year PETA wrote Ben & Jerry's a letter suggesting they start using human milk instead of cow's milk. Apparently, this is an acceptable substitute for them. So veganism is only for the products of other animals, not one's own species. But cows do not have dextrous appendages for mixing ice cream. Is it vegan or not to eat the literal fruit of the loins of one's own species if the food product is made by another species and served back to you? Obviously, it's sick and twisted to do so if the consumer is unaware, but let's say the cows were willing: Would it be vegan?
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My dad and I have had many a conversation on important world issues while on roadtrips, including one infamous family drive where we all did nothing but come up with band names, including the Smiling Potatoes of Death, the State-line Walrus Jockeys and one controversial name that is not allowed to be mentioned in my family since that fated drive. Between Dillon, Montana and Idaho Falls, Idaho, we encountered a grand total of three (3) other cars on our side of the road. This accurately represents how little there was to see. But it was a full moon, casting a certain glow on the mountains as well as the cows in the fields. I quipped to my dad that one knew a scene was magnificent if the cows look picturesque.
This got us discussing the life of a cow. (Like I said, a long road of nothing.) After much discussion, I concluded that I wouldn't enjoy being a cow. "Why?" Dad asked. "Because I wouldn't be able to eat ice cream." ...Amongst castration, a painful procedure of cutting off a cow's horns and inevitable execution, that's the best I could come up with.
I had incorrectly concluded that it would be cannibalistic for a cow to drink cow's milk. While this is true when the character Heffer in the Nickolodeon cartoon "Rocko's Modern Life" eats a hamburger, it is not true of drinking milk. But would it be vegan? We couldn't decide. It's not new news that earlier this year PETA wrote Ben & Jerry's a letter suggesting they start using human milk instead of cow's milk. Apparently, this is an acceptable substitute for them. So veganism is only for the products of other animals, not one's own species. But cows do not have dextrous appendages for mixing ice cream. Is it vegan or not to eat the literal fruit of the loins of one's own species if the food product is made by another species and served back to you? Obviously, it's sick and twisted to do so if the consumer is unaware, but let's say the cows were willing: Would it be vegan?
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Ep.2: A Growl of Approval
My dad and I's cross country drive brought us from Seattle to North Bend to Grand Coullee Dam to Yellowstone by way of Missoula, Montana. ---
My friend in food Aimee has been immortalized for my family and friends because of her recommendations of a delicious nature.* On my recent trip through Yellowstone, I was able to test another of Aimee's tried-and-true.
Big Dipper's in Missoula, Montana offers unique, homemade ice cream at a walk-up stand. The young woman behind the sliding glass window smiled as my father and I took our time deciding what flavors to try on our once-in-a-lifetime trip through Missoula, even though it was 9pm and we were standing in falling snow...The smile faded as it became clear from the passage of time the life-or-death importance of our decision. Finally, I chose the winning combination of cardamom with huckleberry and, while the girl scooped mine up, Dad settled on Mexican chocolate. Each stood out as the best possible choice.
Also featured at Big Dipper's was an 87 oz. five flavor tub known as The Growler. The image featured the same boy from their vintage-looking sign--Great cones! Oh boy!--wearing what looked to me like a Sasquatch costume. During the remainder of my stay, however, I learned that Missoula is home to University of Montana, whose mascot is the Grizzly.
Following the collegiate theme, my stomach roared with approval after finishing my scoops as well as my dad's. And I'm not ashamed to say it: The mixture of cardamom, huckleberry and Mexican chocolate made for an enjoyable burping experience.
Thanks for another great recommendation, Aimee!
*Her most famous example has been Southern Kitchen in Tacoma, WA, home of the best southern cookin' I've had outside of my native region. Everything there is incredible! Everything! You'll get there, order a mason jar of strawberry lemonade along with your entree, which comes with three sides and a corncake, and stuff yourself silly. But it is imperative that you still get their award-winning peach cobbler! Yes, you're full but you'll thank me later.
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