Field Report: Lobster Ice Cream

Happy Halloween! Our spooky Field Report comes from an anonymous colleague…or maybe it was a written by a creature of the damned! Bwa-ha-ha!

The real Martha’s Vineyard is about the creepiest place in the world. I definitely get creeped out easily and by a lot of things, so I might not be the most impartial judge of this place, but I have to say, it was right up there with the “It’s a Small World” ride at Epcot Center. The ways in which people from Cape Cod push Lobster on you and expect you to just nod and chew is really alarming. The day I went to Martha’s Vineyard, I ate lobster three distinctly different ways. The lobster ice cream wasn’t as good as the lobster roll, but I’m not going to lie, the ice cream definitely beat the boiled-alive lobster.

On the way back from Creepy’s Vineyard, we stopped for lobster ice cream. I’d had nothing else but an only-just-quaffable cappuccino all day. Being from the North West gives me an inflated ego when it comes to my coffee palate.

I took a bite of the lobster ice cream that was tilting on a waffle cone, and thought that if I were to die a terrible boiled-alive death, that I hoped never to be made into a kitschy ice-cream flavor. It tasted like eating regular vanilla in a room where someone was canning fish. I smiled and gave a half-hearted “yum” so that my college-boyfriend didn’t feel like his hometown specialty was sickening me. It wasn’t really disgusting, just a little chewy.